Recommendations for supporting siblings
Brian Skotko, M.D., M.P.P., a physician at Children’s Hospital Boston whose sister has Down syndrome, and Susan Levine, a social worker drew on 33 years’ combined experience of running sibling support groups to offer eight recommendations for parents on how best to support siblings when a child with Down syndrome is welcomed to the family unit. Although little research has been done, recent studies suggest that brothers and sisters of children with Down syndrome are affected more positively than negatively by their arrival, developing kindness, empathy and a matured respect for diversity. 1) Be open and honest, explaining Down syndrome as early as possible. Brothers and sisters often prefer to have not one big conversation, but a continuing dialogue as new questions and concerns emerge. If children shy away from bringing up the topic, parents can help by periodically asking if they have any questions. Providing information may prevent unnecessary confusion and worrying. 3) Recognize difficult moments that siblings may experience. Parents can help prepare brothers and sisters to handle embarrassing or upsetting situations, such as seeing people stare at or make fun of their sibling. They should honor a child’s need to establish distance from their sibling with a disability when out in public, especially during the preteen years when the need to “fit in” peaks. 5) Recognize the uniqueness of each child in the family. Brothers and sisters are quick to point out that they, too, need attention and acknowledgement of their accomplishments. Encourage children to reach their full potential, but without feeling the need to “compensate” for their sibling with Down syndrome. 7) Take advantage of supports for siblings. Brothers and sisters are often relieved to talk to peers who share their experience, and to voice both positive and negative feelings. There are many books for children and teens about sibling and disability issues; the National Down Syndrome Congress has a list: www.ndsccenter.org/resources/bibliography06.pdf. These recommendations first appeared in the American Journal of Medical Genetics and are reproduced here with the kind permission of Brian Skotko (www.brianskotko.com) Thanks for your support Brian.
Can you recommend information to help parents prepare a Down Syndrome toddler for the birth of a new baby. I see a lot of information about preparing siblings FOR a Down's baby but have not found anything for the other way around.
Thanks
Debbie
Posted on February 4, 2010